A Life of Fear
I am thinking about “fear” today. Fear can take over and consume your life, eat you alive, without you even realizing it, as it has done to my Mom. She called me today, upset once again about something. She is upset most of the time. Her life is based on fear. I have told her that fear is a big problem for me and for her, but she doesn’t understand. She tells me that she isn’t afraid of anything, when the fact of the matter is that she’s afraid of everything. And of fear itself. Fear rules her life, her very existence. She is afraid that she will get sick and she does. She’s afraid that she’ll be hospitalized and she is. She is afraid of leaving her house, going out the front door to even visit with a neighbor. She is afraid of people. She is afraid that something will happen, so she does nothing, goes nowhere keeping something from happening, or so she thinks. I can’t enjoy a visit with my Mom, go to lunch or go shopping with her. She won’t come to visit me. I live two states away from her. She has not come to see me or her only grand-kids in over 10 years. This is what fear does.
It is powerful and controlling and she is using it to control her life and the lives of my Dad, brother and sister. She has been this way for a long, long time. I am helplessly watching it destroy her life and the lives of those around her. They all get caught up in it. I think that they are afraid also. Of life. Fear runs their lives, too. In little ways, such as going to the grocery store, they always go to the same one, nearby their home. Restaurants are picked by how close they are & how quickly they can eat & get back to their home. They keep their house closed up, no windows open, occasionally the front door will be open, no ventilation or circulation. Fear has won. They fear the world. Yes, it can be a scary place, but you can’t let fear rule you. The emotion of fear has its place, just like other senses do to help you, not harm you. When in balance, fear can be a useful thing.
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Think of how fear plays a part in your life. It is powerful. Keep it in check. Get help to deal with it.